#Non-binary knight.. this one was very fun to make

[coenubiaseraph]

Slow progress but slowly, the designs are being worked at. This time, a skykid based off Fire Opals.

[toa-archive]

Skrael Design Path

Rolling onward to the second of these Arcane Order closer looks and this time it's Skrael at the helm! As ever with these it is far from impossible something else will belatedly turn up. Should this occur, wherever it is added will have a [/edit xx/xx/xxxx] which includes a date marker. Just makes it easier to find the “new” thing :)

Given Skrael is often written by many fic writers as He/They, suppose we got some more non-binary wrongs going on. All for a good cause tho, right?

Skrael is unusual of the three in that his design, from what work is public, was cemented pretty early on. Still, Francisco Ruiz Velasco did have his own stab at a bunch of wizards which are nigh impossible to pin down if it was for any of the Arcane Trio specifically or not. This one will very understandably appear in all three as there could well be a Skrael potential here.

Source goes to Linkedin so may require an account.

According to Yingjue Chen who drew the below Ice Wizard designs, Sean Murray did a sketch which the most Skrael looking one is based. It's a pretty low chance of said sketch ever turning up but you never know.

Source

A coloured version of this very Skrael looking Skrael is also shown in the Art of Wizards panel on the height comparison chart too.

From there comes his final design plus quite literal gesture sketches. These are again by Yingjue Chen!

Source

Skrael next pops up in the hands of Betsy Bauer for his paint and turn around which much like Bellroc is a reference goldmine. He is no longer on her website but you can check out other things she did for ToA here.

Decided to add a trio of bonuses just for fun. You might have noticed the Order pops up in the Wizards credits sequence though unlike Trollhunters and 3Below, it is not Headless Studios. They were drawn in a similar way though! They are by Alison Donato.

Source

This is also a great excuse to yet again break out Francisco Ruiz Velasco's Order band poster again! In part due to him only appearing in colour keys for RotT otherwise.

Source goes to Linkedin so may require an account.

Of all the Order for some reason there's a lot of detail for Skrael's staff. Starting off we have the painted concepts by Yingjue Chen which we lack for Bellroc at this time.

Source

And from theeeere we have a whole bunch from Alison Donato including callouts! The small and texture free Skrael model resized for height comparison purposes will have been made at Leo Sanchez Studios.

Source

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On the more magical front there is a tiny screenshot from the Art of Wizards panel which shows the magic effects for Skrael. It is unknown who the other images including what could be the ice bridge belong to however -

We do have a bigger version of the left image which we know is by Yingjue Chen! Aren’t effects neat?

Source

[/Edit 13/02/2025] The following was missed due to no obvious note of what it is on the original tweet this version is from and it's being added in now. This is the spell effect combining Bellroc, Skrael and the Green Knight's power into a single shot! It is by Isaac Orloff.

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Poking Rise of the Titans a moment, thanks to Andy Murray we have the glow up eye effect for Skrael. This has been cropped from a larger image for fitting this post reasons only.

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And for fun since we also have it, this is the Arcane Circle for Skrael which is shown on the Ice Titan. The Genesis Seal marker is on the same row as Bellroc so is not shown here. As above it has been cropped for fitting this post reasons only. This time they are by Sean Wang.

Source

Much like Nari, we do actually know what Skrael's development name: Thule! They're not in the most easy to spot place mind and likely why many have missed it over the years. One of them is in Alison Donato's file names on her website like so:

The other location is on one of the Felix Yang sequences that hasn't been converted from nyoom status yet. In this case, yeah you have to be very lucky to spot it:

It can can be found Here.

When all three posts are up there will be a link here to the other two members. For now it is a half completed placeholder:

Bellroc - Nari - Skrael

[themonsterundermystairs]

short list of lgbt-inclusive games that i love (in brackets is the kind of representation):

- cattails and it‘s sequel, cattails: wildwood story (nonbinary, queer in general): these are both great games that warrior cats fans will love. also, every single cat in the game is non binary. everyone is only referred to by they/them and you can have kittens with anyone.

- starfield (nonbinary, bi, same sex relationships, trans): you can choose your pronouns (he, she or they) no matter your body type. you can also always change your body and pronouns for a small fee. some main companions talk about former partners of the same gender, in at least one case, a character references dating men and women. guards may also reference a partner of the same gender.

- skyrim (same sex relationships for player, gay): you can marry regardless of gender and adopt kids with your spouse. there is a dead gay couple. (this will be the only game with so little representation on this list. i included it because i love skyrim, because you can make it gayer with mods and because it is from 2011 so i don‘t have high expectations)

- ikenfell (nonbinary, queer relationships, neopronouns): a really fun rpg with a fun combat system. also very queer, every character has their pronouns listed and there are nonbinary people with they/them, ze/zir and even he/him pronouns. i haven‘t quite finished playing through it yet, but there are all kinds of queer relationships. oh and you save the game by petting cats

- wandersong (queer relationships, gender nonconformity, nonbinary): a really unique and wholesome game about a bard that wants to save the world. it has an amazing story and some of the most well written characters i have ever encountered. the bard is nonbinary and uses all pronouns and there is a noteworthy nonbinary character whose story doesn‘t revolve around them being nonbinary. they are fully accepted. there are plenty of queer relationships. there are mermaids with beard stubble.

- a short hike (nonbinary): an amazingly fun game that actually feels like a holiday. it also has a super fast turtle that goes by they/them pronouns

- shovel knight (queer relationships, trans, nonbinary): fun platformer that allows you to choose your body type (male/female) and your pronouns (he/she/they) independently from one another. you can also do the same for all bosses and your love interest.

- squidlit and super squidlit: really fun gameboy style games that were created by independent trans developers.

[faerghusfucker]

What are your lgbt headcanons for fe3h? You can only do some characters if u want like just ur favorites 👉👈

i truly think that all these bitches are gay in some capacity. not a cishet human being present in that damn monastery.

my most thought-about one is transmasc felix because i think it deepens his conflict with his dad in a really cool way :3 i have a whole post on that one lol it means a lot to me

i’m also a TRANSFEM HUBERT FAN!!!!!!! i’ve been wanting to draw her post-war after she’s able to transition. helena von vestra will be the most esteemed pegasus knight in all of adrestia

non-binary linhardt is also one that i adore. i choose to believe that his baggy pants are a skirt instead bc there’s a piece of official art where it looks like that and skirt linhardt means everything to me. idc that in his 3D model it’s obviously pants. skirt lin is canon TO ME. he gives so little of a fuck abt what anyone thinks that that extends to his gender too.

@medicallyfascinating just posted a really awesome allo-aro ferdinand headcanon that i have stolen bc they’re the CEO of ferdinand in my mind.

i think that ingrid is a LESBIAN and she only has the amount of paired endings with men that she does bc of compulsive heterosexuality and the “need” for a husband that’s been ingrained in her. even despite her pursuing knighthood and rejecting her father’s wishes, i think she still feels a lot of internal pressure to marry and so she just chooses whichever man she happens to be closest to. i think dorothea was her gay awakening but she’s not ready for all that.

speaking of dorothea. BISEXUAL IN EVERY SENSE OF THE WORD and she pulls too. she is the human being with the MOST game in all of garreg mach, move over sylvain.

balthus loves milfs and ALSO dilfs. i think he wants jeralt.

all three of the lords are bi because you can tell they all have a fat crush on byleth the entire game. especially dimitri and edelgard. azure moon is practically a love story with the way it’s set up. the fact that dimileth cant canonically be mlm is one of 3H’s greatest flaws and i mean that completely seriously.

dedue has probably been a lot of people’s awakenings. especially ashe’s. i think ashe had never really been attracted to many people before meeting dedue. i’m so normal about them actually.

contrary to popular belief i like to keep yuri’s canon bi-ness because i think he takes pride in being able to make any relationship he’s in scandalous. as a man who looks a lot like a woman there’s really no way to win in a heteronormative society (which fodlan absolutely is) and i think yuri has some fun with that. embraces it even.

i think lorenz is the most deeply repressed individual known to man. he looks for a wife as if looking for a business partner. he can’t even conceive of sexuality at all. i don’t know what he is because i don’t think HE knows what he is. this never changes for him.

leonie is my beloved butch. however i do think she and felix getting platonic married and becoming clowns together is fucking awesome. keep it up guys.

hilda’s pan i think. she flirts with everything that moves. sylvain as well but he’s slow to learn. i think he had a crush on glenn and then felix but rationalized it to himself by saying both of them look like girls so of course he’s into them. but it’s deeper than that. he doesn’t wanna unpack that tho he has a job to do.

ignatz and raphael are the definition of a qpr to me. just a good pair of buddies. i love them. i think they’re both aro but judging by that flayn support ignatz is NOT ace. i know he’s a little freak. love him tho 💓

i think lysithea is pan but she doesn’t feel like she’s good enough for girls :[ they’re all so much better at being girl and doing girl things than her. same with marianne and bernie i feel like. they’re all very insecure and it comes out in different ways.

mercedes being transfem is smth i like a lot :3 i think her finding support within her church to transition would be rlly nice and sweet.

annette to me is ace allo and likes guys. i really like how all her best ships are just guys who love to hear her sing and hang out :3 it’s so cutesy.

jeritza is GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL GAY. he wants m!byleth so bad it makes him look STUPID. byletza is my otp those two are so beautiful and freaky together

byleth is pan. enough said

i think i got like a good portion of the cast but if there’s anyone else you’re curious about, hit me up. if i don’t have anything specific in mind already ill make something up, no one is off limits. i love gay ppl

[sickfreaksirkay]

okay no one asked but here’s some of my thoughts on bliss & blunder (spoilers under the cut)

to preface this probably none of it will make sense if you haven’t read the book sorry

did arthur basically kidnap mordred from india and just take him to england? did i misread that part? what?

gawain lancelot and gareth fighting the taliban in afghanistan is just not something i can comprehend. even ignoring the insanity of them doing that it also kind of feels out of place and random in the story itself? like it’s a tech ceo au but also some of them fought in afghanistan?

arthur wears an apple watch which is a horrible image and also he invites jeff bezos elon musk and obama to his birthday party. and they come 

gawain gets to do his green knight exchange of winnings thing 🥳 big fan of that situation he has going on and it’s a cool scenario with him working in the pub

i think the portrayal of gwen is really really good and it’s very refreshing to see such a strong focus on her and her emotions throughout the book

i think maybe there’s a few too many plot lines and switches of focus and some of them seem very sudden / random / out of nowhere, i feel like it could have benefitted from cutting a few plotlines/sections to be able to give more of a focus and make it less confusing, but maybe that’s just me (also the time jumps were confusing but i could follow them enough)

probably just a typo but at one point galahad is misgendered by the narration and i do think if you have a non binary character you should make 100% sure you haven’t accidentally called them the wrong pronoun at any point

i love the whole wasteland thing!!!! very cool link to the medieval stories

not a big fan of kay’s characterisation since he’s a bit transphobic to galahad but when am i ever a fan of kay’s characterisation

HUGE fan of mordred and galahad in this i think gwen and those two stole the show for me, i just wish there was more of mordred and galahad. galahad’s character is VERY cool im kind of obsessed with them… non binary vegan galahad… i do think it makes sense in this universe to have galahad be into sustainability

love whatever gawain and lancelot have going on. the most fucked up exes of all time engaging in ridiculous methods of not having to see each other <3

still can’t tell who carly is supposed to be in terms of the medieval characters, i could figure out pretty much everyone except for her 😭

overall i did like it quite a lot despite it not being the kind of book i normally like and my issue with the amount of stuff happening at once in it, i think gwen mordred and galahad kind of carried it for me!! im glad i read it since its such an insanely different version of arthurian stuff and i never would’ve imagined having arthur as a tech ceo so it was definitely a fun read even if it’s not like. the most incredible literature

[kirby-souljourney-au]

Morpho Knight!!! :D

Yay Mori!!!!!!!! It Marophim!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Lesgo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fun fact: this form is actually a disguise. Mortal species aren’t meant to see Goddesses in their entirety, so Mori was told to disguise themself as something fitting. They chose to be a Butterfly, which are very common in Gamble Galaxy, for when they’re around others; when they’re alone, or only with Astrals or other Reapers, they look like this!

Their true form is far more Draconic. Big, bony wings, horns, clawed feet, and the like.

Trans bug info and hex codes under the cut! Trans bug trans bug

(Remember, ArtShield desaturates images put through it, so if you’re going to draw them, reference the listed hex codes!)

Full name: Marophim

Aliases: Morpho Knight, ‘Mori’

Species: Draconic Demigod

Planet of Origination: Concept Universe

Age: 20,890,968

Height: 7’0”

Gender: Biologically female; identifies as non-binary

Pronouns: They/Them/Theirs

Sexuality: Queer, asexual

S/O: Empress (joyfriend), Mirror-World Ione/Dark Meta Knight (boyfriend), Mirror-World Galacta/Mirogala (partner)

Family: Yacho’o (mother), Yway (sister), Yakii (sister), Ophanim (sister)

One of Yacho’o’s children, tasked with reaping lost souls.

In a romantic polycule with Empress and the Mirror-World versions of Ione and Galacta, otherwise known as Dark and Mirogala (or Miro). Does not currently plan on having children with any of them.

Child of a Goddess, though not reaching Ykka levels of power, they were born and raised to be among the most powerful Grim Reapers in the Multiverse. They’ve been reaping souls for most of their life, starting at 200 years old.

A kind and usually quiet person. They’re incredibly hyper-empathetic, and capable of sensing a person’s emotions due to countless years of exposure to Souls. As such, they’re very good at comforting others, and are one of the most understanding people on Popstar, without exaggeration.

Has lived in many places across their long lifetime, but has settled in a few places; most recently, they decided to live in Dreamland to help in training and protecting the planet’s guardian, Kirby. They’re not meant to interact with the living very often, because of their status as both a Demigod and Grim Reaper, so they don’t have many friends, but they make do with what they have, and they’re grateful.

Their weapon of choice is the Doomblade Ares, forged by their mother Yacho’o specifically for the purpose of reaping Souls. They also use their natural Fire magic on occasion, but not very commonly.

Hex codes

Both:

#171717 — Hair base

#1A1A1A — Skin

#3A3735 — Scars

#FFB062 — Wings fade / Loincloth fade

#FB7332 — Hair fade / Antennae / Inner ears

#D42214 — Wings base / Loincloth base

#FFE2D5 — Pupils

#FFFFFF — Eye whites / Freckles

Casual:

#3A2B23 — String 1

#A00909 — String 2

#FF591D — Kimono 1 (pattern using same colour with Morpho Glitter brush, brush blend mode Add, twice on same layer with alpha lock)

#FF8B41 — Kimono 2

#FFB97D — Kimono 3 (pattern using same colour with Victorian brush, layer blend mode Colour Burn)

#FFE1C8 — Kimono 4 (undershirt??????? Idk)

Armoured:

#000000 — Helmet accents

#4E0303 — Dress

#DF6024 — Armour accents

#E57D35 — Armour 4

#EFAC4D — Hand guards

#EEA870 — Armour 3

#EEC894 — Armour 2

#CDC8C6 — Armour 1

Wings:

#D42214 — Base

#FFB062 — Fade (effect using same colour with Clouds brush, layer blend mode Add, layer opacity 75%)

[a-teacup-of-golden-cracks]

tw this is a trauma post but it's also a narrative I'm proud of. Suicide and self harm (mental and physical) will be mentioned.

To help those who aren't me understand, I think in part in references since it is both easier and more fun than creating original thoughts.

(1): reference to the videogame Omori

(2): reference to the movie The Dark Knight (take a guess as to why I like and relate to the joker)

(3): reference to a song I like (in order, HOPE by NF, Somewhere I Belong by Linkin Park, Love the Subhuman Self by AISHA, Arc System Works, and Jamison Boaz)

(4): a random saying I heard and enjoyed

“No one knows what it's like to be the bad man, to be the sad man behind blue eyes. No one knows what it's like to be hated, to be fated to telling only lies”

“Behind blue eyes” by The Who

Welcome to the nonsensical abyss of my mind, you've been here as long as you can remember (1). By reading this you're getting to see my thoughts without translation. Nothing here makes sense to anyone except me, I make references others rarely understand. But allow me to tell the story of how what you see now came to be. You wanna know how I got these scars (2)? “I spent years of my life holdin’ on to things I never should've kept, full of hatred, years of my life wishin I was someone different looking for some validation.” (3)

Middle school was a special sort of subtle hell for me, it stole things without me noticing. First it was my feeling of impervious safety when a kid laughed at a genuine heartfelt remark I made. Then it was my trust that friends would never betray me and always respect me when they wouldn't stop making jokes at my expense. Slowly, steadily I descended into paranoia and loneliness, and thus my contentedness with life was stolen. The ax forgets yet the tree never does(4).

A secret hidden issue that I only found out this year was that the ADHD meds I needed to take to function may have been causing the paranoia to start with. I still don't know how to feel about that, that all my issues and trauma might stem from something that's not even real.

Once I started high school it became more and more apparent that nobody liked me. At least not for very long. I never learned to function in middle school so I was still struggling with what everyone else already knew and mastered. Giving a compliment and sexual harassment, would you like to know the difference? I would've but nobody told me until after I'd been punished.

Intent vs impact, I never intended to hurt anyone yet my impact was that I did more often than not. So I cut off the things that hurt people, removed them from my mind. Who needs humor? Not me if I can't use it right. Who needs to give compliments? Not me if I can't say it right. Who needs to hug people to show affection because it's your primary love language and you want to show everyone how much you like and appreciate them? …… not me…. if I must…. to not hurt them…

You see where my inner pain starts now? Where the scars in my mind begin? There were two things I could never bear to cut and slice away, my name and my kindness. Most trans people change their names to align more with their gender but I decided no. I am done changing things for other people to accept me more, they never do. My name is Daniel and it's the sum of my entire being. If I am non-binary, or a woman, or some eldritch horror that everyone fears and that has lost every shred of humanity because of the things I've endured, then my name represents all of that. It's not my issue if people make a poor assumption about my name because of what they think it should be.

Maybe I don't even want to be human anymore if all that humans have shown me is hate. All throughout high school it was nothing but hate or dislike shown to me, barely any kindness outside of my family. So I isolated myself from everyone, to avoid those who hated and to not burden my family with my issues. I'd handle it by myself like I always had in the past and I'd be ok.

I was not ok.

I was rageful. I was tearing myself apart more and more and more internally, only my desire to never hurt anyone kept me from tearing the school down brick by brick with all the students inside it. But maybe… could it be I was the exception and the problem? Could it be I'm the one who deserves to hurt for the pain I've caused? Should I hurt myself? And so I tried once, a good solid punch to the forehead that didn't make me feel any better and never tried again.

The pain I deserved wasn't physical, it was mental and so I gave myself infinite mental pain. What an idiot I was for giving that compliment when clearly in retrospect it was sexual harassment, what a dumbass I was for saying that joke, looking back I deserve to lose my entire friend group over it. Maybe I'd be better off if I didn't exist anymore if I caused more harm than good and could never seem to learn or improve. The thoughts I had then… and sometimes still now… it's so hard to remember that looking into the past makes everything obvious in the worst ways possible…

But there was a light eventually, someone who told me all that was wrong. Someone I met online and will never see in person, someone I messed up horribly with and yet she still forgave me. Thank you infinitely June. You showed me that monsters can be good.

So I steeled my resolve and used my rage at myself to look inward and outward and found that I was being mistreated and misunderstood. I shouldn't kill myself to not exist or hurt people because I would improve and I could make others improve. So I stood at the very last meeting in front of the whole school and spoke the truth of my mind with as much respect and rage as I could muster. So much pain and anger and hate and sadness I'd endured and I showed all of it to the entire high school of 300 people.

I've never felt more satisfied in my life than when the headmaster of the school himself asked if there was anything he could do for me and I said no. I've never felt more proud when I met with him two days later and asked for a neurodivergent support group to be created for the middle and high school, and he said yes. Half a year later my brother told me that the headmaster stuck to his word and did more than I asked. I never felt more vindicated than when I was told by my only friend that he'd heard people making school shooter jokes after I stood up and told my story.

And so I started to heal. My humor, I did need that. How could I be happy if I could never make myself laugh? My desire to give joy and be kind, I needed that. How could I not fulfill the purpose in life I'd made for myself? My ability to hug and love and be happy with others, I needed that. Desperately. “I want to heal, I want to feel what I thought was never real, like there was somewhere I belong.”(3) I just needed to find better people who understood. I reconnected with my family and told my pain and tried in every possible way to show how sorry and sad I was for cutting them off. I couldn't stitch the old bits back onto me but maybe I could grow something new. Something I wanted and I loved, for me.

I can never fully heal, that's why you see the holes in my form, but I've incorporated them now, so that they help me as much as they hurt. I carry on and love my subhuman self, accept me for me and go back to being with humans (3). I give them the kindnesses I can but only after I do that for myself. This is the kindness and respect I give to me, the biggest change I made, because I deserve it as much as everyone else. Now close your eyes and you'll leave this dream (1).

“But my dreams, they aren't as empty as my conscience seems to be.”

Behind Blue Eyes by the Who

[enbydust]

Disclaimer: I don’t play ukelele but if you get the reference you get a gold star

Realized I have way more followers than I thought, I guess I should probably make a pinned post so first a few things outta the way

MINORS DNI this isn’t for you. really. leave.

BIGOTS DNI unless you wanna send me hate mail for entertainment, just know your opinion means shit to me.

CW EVERTHING I post and reblog and barely use tags so scroll at your own risk

Don’t bring hate into my space, follow that one rule and you are welcome.

Anyway, I’m enbydust! You can call me Kay or dust :)

This is my side blog, but it’s basically my main. It’s mostly hornyposts and shitposts but anything goes really. Kinda a place for me to be authentic.

I’m non-binary, pronouns are they/she/it/he but anything goes tbh as long as you’re not being a dick about it. Also transfem and very VERY t4t.

Things I like:

-I love a platformer that makes me want to kill myself (Dead Cells, Blasphemous, Hollow Knight…) and just about any rougelike

-MUSIC TALK TO ME ABOUT THE MUSIC YOU LIKE ASK ME ABOUT THE MUSIC I LIKE I LOVE MUSIC ASFHEPIGGHLSD

(what i like is all over the place and usually obscure-you’ve been warned)

-Stories that fill me with an

unknowable dread

-Overanalyzing fiction and myself

DM’s are always open I love to talk (read: infodump) Also asks are fun, I’ll answer almost anything tbh!

I have terrible self doubt and it will come through in my posts and shit, sorry in advance

Pfp Hall of Fame below the cut

Pfp hall of fame

Credit to PotatoLord’s picrew for this one

UNDER CONSTRUCTION

[grigori77]

2023 in Movies, My Top 30 Fave Movies (Part 3)

10.  NIMONA – we almost didn’t get 2023’s most socially important animated feature.  When Disney acquired Twentieth Century Fox and everything went tits up for its various affiliates, animation house Blue Sky Studios bit the dust just as this long-awaited adaptation of influential She-Ra & the Princesses of Power showrunner ND Stevenson’s beloved fantastical graphic novel from Spies In Disguise directors Nick Bruno and Troy Quaine was nearing completion, and it looked like it might never see the light of day … at least until Annapurna Pictures and Netflix swooped in to the rescue, snapping it up, funding its completion and getting it out on streaming to the delight of all of us who’d thought it was essentially LOST.  The end result is just about THE VERY BEST movie I’ve ever seen about the struggles of being non-binary and not conforming to any set gender norms in modern society, viewed through the fantasy prism of a shapeshifting “teenager” who effortlessly steals their own film.  Chloe Grace Moretz is perfectly cast as the voice of the titular misfit anarchist troublemaker supernatural being, who finds an opportunity for some fresh chaos by joining forces with Ballister Boldheart (Riz Ahmed), a newly-knighted commoner who becomes public enemy number one after being viciously framed for the murder of the queen of a futuristic medieval society (really!) built around chivalry and the righteous smiting of monsters.  Ballister’s determined to prove his innocence, while Nimona just wants to create havoc, while they’re both being hunted by his former fellow knights, led by his ex-boyfriend Ambrosius Goldenloin (Eugene Lee Yang of The Try Guys), a direct descendent of the Kingdom’s legendary original monster slaying heroine Gloreth.  It’s a gloriously original piece of work, the animation presented in a truly GORGEOUS brightly coloured 2-dimensional 3D graphic style that at once riffs on the ingenious visual inventiveness of the Spider-Verse movies while also creating something COMPLETELY NEW but simultaneously lovably reminiscent of the classic Blue Sky cartoony look, while the frequently chaotic action is just as infectiously anarchic as the lead character herself.  It’s also fiendishly brilliant in its subversive message and twisty logic, making the viewer question what being a monster REALLY means, and if what we SEE someone as REALLY IS their true identity.  Needless to say, Moretz runs away with the whole film, while the character of Nimona herself is a truly ENCHANTING and thoroughly inspiring creation who’s destined to become an iconic hero for non-binary and trans kids around the world, but Ahmed and Yang are clearly having a great time here too, as is Frances Conroy as the Director of the Kingdom’s knights, having a blast bringing icy menace to her deliciously duplicitous villainous turn.  It’s an incredibly FUN movie, shot through with a rich and rewardingly infectious sense of humour, taking classic fantasy tropes and turning them on their head in new and wonderfully inventive ways, but it knows JUST when to get serious too, and there are some powerful moments when it grabs hold of your heart and DESTROYS YOU emotionally, especially in the incredibly evocative climax.  Ultimately this ISN’T an overly faithful adaptation of Stevenson’s original graphic novel – he was in a darker place when he wrote and drew it, going through his own complicated struggle with his gender identity before finally making his personal transition in 2022 – but it certainly is rewardingly true to the book’s spirit and deep-down message of inclusion, positivity and being true to your core identity, which makes it one of the most important animated films to be made in a very long time.  I’m so happy it’s received the TRULY MASSIVE amount of attention and LOVE it’s garnered since its release, and I thank Netflix and everybody else who made the effort to get this movie out after all when Disney seemed so reluctant to take a chance on it.  This deserves to be seen, it NEEDS to be seen, and I urge you to check it out.

9.  RENFIELD – my horror movie of 2023 sits very comfortably in the genre’s sub-category that I’ve always loved best, a jet black comedy of particularly rare quality and gleeful abandon that made it one of the most entertaining viewing experiences I had this past year.  Yeah, like the best horror comedies it has enough genuine darkness that it CAN be genuinely scary when it wants to be, but given the sheer (literal) batshit craziness of its premise this is a BONKERS FILM, and so it wisely embraces its sheer lampoonery to full effect without reservation.  Not that it’s overly surprising – director Chris McKay cut his teeth helming The Lego Batman Movie before branching out into live action with Amazon’s criminally underrated time travelling alien invasion blockbuster The Tomorrow War, both of which were excellent vehicles for him to master the gloriously anarchic style that he finally unleashes fully formed for this brilliant alternative sequel to the classic Universal Dracula movie with Bela Lugosi.  That being said, the big box office draw here was always going to be Nicolas Cage, who pays loving tribute to Lugosi as the infamous Count, kicking into his typical “manic” setting to chew the scenery with ruthless abandon and, as a result, frequently steal the show right out from under Nicholas Hoult as his titular ghoul manservant, the long-suffering Robert Montague Renfield, who just wants the opportunity to finally find a real, simple life for himself and thinks he can pull it off in modern day New Orleans, only for his Master to himself become inspired by Renfield’s newfound ambition and set his sights on world domination with the help of the Lobos, a brutal local crime family.  Thankfully Hoult DOES manage to hold his own in his scenes with Cage, as always proving ADEPTLY talented enough to deliver another winningly endearing performance while playing perhaps the single most pathetic specimen of his career to date … meanwhile the thoroughly adorable Awkwafina once again proves she’s well on the way to becoming the PREMIER kooky goofball female comedic lead in Hollywood as Rebecca Quincy, the one truly honest cop in one of the most corrupt police forces in all of America, who winds up falling for Renfield’s hangdog charm and puppy-dog eyes as he inadvertently becomes the key to her quest to bring down the Lobos after they murdered her legendary detective father.  Shohreh Aghdashloo brings a much needed touch of class to proceedings as Bellafrancesca Lobo, the family’s seductively sly matriarch, while Space Force and Sonic the Hedgehog’s Ben Schwarz is a frequent non-PC laugh riot all on his own as her entitled constant disappointment of a son Teddy, and Ghosts’ Brandon Scott Jones is lovably flaky as the leader of Renfield’s endearingly pathetic support group for people trapped in toxic co-dependent relationships.  This genuinely is a DEEPLY FUNNY FILM, perfectly geared up for a maximum hit count with the one-liners, in-jokes and situations, but then there’s no surprise here since writer Ryan Ridley (adapting a pitch from The Walking Dead’s original creator Robert Kirkman) is a seasoned veteran of TV comedy, particularly well known as an alumnus of the similarly edgy and madcap Rick & Morty, and this carries a lot of the same twisted, anarchic charm as that rightly beloved series, just in a much more big budget live action form.  It’s also SPECTACULARLY bloodthirsty when it wants to be, the welcome reliance on what are clearly LARGELY physical effects meaning that this movie is another gore-hound’s wet dream, even if the film does mostly play the horror elements for laughs throughout, and it’s an impressively inventive and chaotic beast in THAT regard too, delivering some of the most gloriously OTT splatter-fuelled action sequences I’ve seen in a good while whenever Renfield eats a bug and gets an ultraviolent power boost.  Altogether this is definitely some of the most fun I had at the cinema this past year, and I’ll admit I wouldn’t mind a bit more of this if they DID fancy trying the sequel road after all …

8.  LEAVE THE WORLD BEHIND – Mr Robot was one of THE all-time great TV revelations of the 2010s, creator/showrunner Sam Esmail becoming a genuinely challenging counter-culture voice responsible for hard-hitting, thought-provoking material which really shook up the status quo.  Shocking, then, that his only real notable foray onto the BIG screen was with the offbeat but ultimately overlooked romantic comedy fantasy Comet, but that balance has FINALLY been redressed almost a decade later with this powerhouse leftfield tour-de-force dystopian apocalyptic thriller from Netflix.  Adapting the already hard-hitting, critically acclaimed novel by Rumaan Alam, Esmail wastes no time in weaving a spell of subtly inexplicable unease as we follow a family of well-to-do New Yorkers who take the opportunity to get out of the city for a break on the coast after renting someone else’s house for a long weekend, only for the owners to suddenly return in the night with tales of a blackout and more bafflingly worrying events unfolding in the outside world, hoping they can stay too until they know more.  Feelings of distrust and paranoia immediately settle in and refuse to leave even as the two families warily get to know one another, but then things are getting WEIRD – the internet and TV are DOWN, drones are dropping indecipherable foreign propaganda from the skies and there are sudden bursts of head-splitting noise coming from SOMEWHERE … all too slowly it becomes clear that something truly terrible is happening, and that there’s more than just rumoured cyber-attacks at work here.  This really is CHILD’S PLAY for Esmail, who’s clearly having a wild old time crafting a twisting, unnervingly unsettling suspense thriller which sticks the knife in and keeps on twisting as things get more worryingly desperate, all while casting a deeply critical eye on the state of modern society, capitalism, pop culture and pervading racial and social divides.  Julia Roberts and Ethan Hawke are both typically EXCELLENT as Amanda and Clay Sandford, the white liberal upper class couple who find their deep-seated preconceptions forming their perceptions as they’re forced to deal with the as always truly MAGNIFICENT Mahershala Ali’s cultured stockbroker G.H. Scott and his brash, opinionated daughter Ruth (Industry and Bodies Bodies Bodies’ Myha’la), while there’s a brief but unsurprisingly POTENT turn from Kevin Bacon as Danny, the exact kind of paranoid, doomsday prepping redneck who’s probably gonna survive this coming apocalypse JUST FINE.  There’s SO MUCH to unpack and explore in this film, it’s definitely one of those film’s that rewards repeat viewing with neat little twists, fascinatingly subtle hints and clues which lead to insidiously profound payoffs and more sneaky little easter eggs than you could EVER spot on a single viewing, leading to a truly HORRIFYING existential climax which will lead to many a sleepless night given the way this world seems to be heading.  Speculative science fiction or worryingly potent prophecy?  Only time will tell, I guess …

7.  SPIDER-MAN: ACROSS THE SPIDER-VERSE – the animated feature that completely CHANGED THE GAME at the end of the last DECADE getting a sequel was pretty much a no-brainer, but it didn’t make the wait any easier, and after COVID put a dent in so many of the big releases coming forward this was definitely one of the most painful delays for me.  Finally getting to see it was, therefore, ONE HELL of a cathartic release of tension, so much that even later discovering that not everything was exactly GOOD in the production studios at the time (namely the animators being crunched LIKE CRAZY by the ever-shifting nature of the vision they were being asked to realise, leading to a toxic working environment for many, which is NEVER cool) still didn’t dent my truly AWED appreciation for the finished film.  Seriously, this is THE BEST animated feature we saw this past year, and ALREADY a strong candidate for best animated feature of THIS DECADE (although that’s likely to change if the incoming sequel turns out to be as good, if not BETTER, which it probability WILL).  Honestly, I could end the review right here just with that recommendation, it’s GENUINELY THAT GOOD, people.  But I still got a job to do here, so … once again, Miles Morales (Dope’s Shameik Moore), the new Spider-Man in his world, is at the centre of a whirlwind of narrative chaos as a new arch-nemesis he never knew he had emerges to hold him to account for what he did when he destroyed the Kingpin’s interdimensionally destructive supercollider in the first film – the Spot (Jason Schwartzman), a former scientist at Alchemax who got turned into a walking mass of unstable wormholes when he got hit with the full brunt of all that quantum energy.  As he embarks on his quest to take his misguided revenge on Miles, his interdimensional spree of carnage leads our Spider-Man to become connected with a Multiverse-spanning cadre of Spider-People, led by the spectacularly stern Spider-Man of Earth 2099, Miguel O’Hara (Oscar Isaac), who police the various Earths in order to combat and remove “anomalies” that arise to threaten them … and

the Spot is a BIG ONE of those.  Oh, and Gwen Stacy (Hailee Steinfeld), the Spider-Woman Miles most definitely fell for in the first film, has started working with them too after her own father, police Captain George Stacy (Shea Wigham), who’s had it in for their Spider-Woman after she was mistakenly framed for the death of their Earth’s Peter Parker, discovered her secret identity and made her run from her own dimension as a result …yeah, it sounds pretty complicated, but this whole twisted labyrinth is, nonetheless, unveiled in the exact same super-slick, viewer-friendly way the first film pulled off its own exposition, which just makes more room for all the FUN as we get to follow our old favourites and a whole host of fascinating NEW incarnations of our favourite arachnid-themed superhero on their various insane adventures.  This is JUST AS SPECTACULAR in terms of action, character work, pure invention and sheer, unrivalled SPECTACLE as its predecessor, in many places upping the wow factor SIGNIFICANTLY (particularly during a particularly colourful visit to the distinctly Indian-flavoured alternative version of New York called Mumbattan, which is the stomping ground of one of the film’s most memorable new Spider-folk, the irrepressibly chipper Pavitr Prabhakar, voiced by Deadpool’s thoroughly brilliant Karan Soni).  Indeed, the most fun we have throughout this movie is definitely getting to hang out not only with our old friends but all these newcomers too, with Pavitr being joined by the fascinating likes of the very coolest Spider-Woman after Gwen, Jess Drew (Awkward Black Girl’s Issa Rae), digital avatar Margo Kess/Spider-Byte (The Hunger Games’ Amandla Stenberg), overly-angsty living Todd McFarlane comic panel Ben Reily/Scarlet Spider (the incomparable Andy Samberg) and even Mayday Parker, the impossibly adorable new baby daughter of Jake Johnson’s welcome returning fan-favourite OG Peter Parker (and, of course, Miles’ original mentor from the first movie), who’s ALREADY got her spider-powers, while Miguel is a FANTASTIC character, brooding like a champ and sometimes proving to be as much of an EXTREMELY EFFECTIVE villain in the story as the Spot, especially once his beef

with Miles is revealed … but at the end of the day, ALL of these new arrivals thoroughly PALE in comparison to one of this film’s BEST secret weapons, Hobie Brown/Spider Punk (Daniel Kaluuya getting to use his normal accent for once), a misfit non-conformist anarchist JOY with one hell of a problem with authority (Miguel’s IN PARTICULAR) who effortlessly steals our hearts just as much as EVERY SINGLE SCENE he’s in.  That being said, it really is SO GREAT having our old crew back – Miles and Gwen are SO SWEET, their chemistry is just OFF THE BLOODY CHARTS without them even trying, and I adore every single scene of them together, never mind their own individual storylines (it’s PARTICULARLY great getting to see Gwen herself get a SIGNIFICANTLY enlarged narrative presence this time round, becoming JUST as important in this story as Miles himself), while any time we get to spend with Johnson’s Peter is pure gold, and we get to spend even more time with Miles’ wonderful, loving, hard-working parents Jeff and Rio Morales (Brian Tyree Henry and Lauren Velez), which is ALWAYS a plus.  Needless to say, this is a whole LOAD of fun, shot through with the same classic winning humour, wild invention, visionary experimentation, thematic resonance and pure geeky in-joke easter egg-packing FAN SERVICE that made the first film such a winner, but it also comes through BIG TIME with more of those wicked FEELS, this time ramping things up FAR MORE with the serious emotional HEFT as we’re presented with some truly DEVASTATING character arcs whose after effects are gonna be felt for A VERY LONG TIME after.  The fact that this is just the first half of a two-part SAGA, with Beyond the Spider-Verse currently in the works, means that we can look forward to PLENTY MORE, although here’s hoping that this time they give their animators a little more BREATHING ROOM to get it done right WITHOUT having to break their backs in the process, yeah?  Then again, with the writers’ AND actors’ strike barely over, the likelihood of THAT is pretty strong …

6.  OPPENHEIMER – really, is there ANY SURPRISE over this placing so high?  You know what a MASSIVE Christopher Nolan fan I am, and him making a proper EPIC historical biopic examining the career and achievements of the father of nuclear power was GUARANTEED to not only grab my attention but also thoroughly please the serious high-brow cinema appreciator buried inside me over all that action junkie, superhero fanboy and sci-fi-nut stuff … but yeah, this was ALWAYS gonna be a fucking amazing film, wasn’t it?  Nolan’s most regular acting collaborator (outside of Michael Caine, anyway), Cillian Murphy, stars as J. Robert Oppenheimer, the theoretical physicist who spearheaded the Manhattan Project which led to the creation of the very first viable nuclear weapons which were then used by the American military to destroy the Japanese cities of Hiroshima and Nagasaki and end the Second World War.  On the surface he seems like a driven, visionary man with a real fascination for the science he’s pioneering, but also a cool pragmatism which makes him the ideal man to usher in this astounding technological achievement, but as the film unfolds in Nolan’s typical non-linear narrative fashion we discover a far more complex man than we first supposed, Murphy unveiling Oppenheimer’s deep-seeded fears about the frighteningly real dangers his Project could give birth to.  After all, he may have been the father of the Modern World, but this particular creation also gave rise to a century of technological horrors and a whole new, long lasting Cold War.   Anyway, this is UNDENIABLY the greatest performance of Murphy’s career, if he doesn’t at least get an Oscar nod for this there’s no justice in the world, while, in typical Nolan fashion, the rest of the rich ensemble cast is a genuine embarrassment of riches, from Emily Blunt as Oppenheimer’s long-suffering wife Kitty and Florence Pugh as his ill-fated Communist mistress Jean Tatlock to Matt Damon as his nominal “boss”, Gen. Leslie Groves, Kenneth Brannagh as his mentor and idol Niels Bohr, the mighty Tom Conti as the even MORE awesome Albert Einstein and even Robert Downey Jr. in a particularly KEY role as Oppenheimer’s one-time colleague and later rival, Atomic Energy commissioner Lewis Strauss, who dominates the parallel narrative throughline presented over the course of the film as his own efforts to discredit and destroy the great man ultimately end up coming back to bite his own political ambitions.  To a man, they’re all as MAGNIFICENT as the rest of the film, which is a fascinating journey into the dark heart of one of the greatest but also most historically and socially destructive scientific achievements in the history of the world, the man who ushered it in, and the hell he then went through afterwards when he then tried to make sure we didn’t make it SO MUCH WORSE once we had the power to destroy ourselves.  It’s a film that raises extremely tough questions, and what answers we ARE able to come to are every bit as terrifying as any of the consequences that are either seen or merely suggested here.  Nolan is, as always, A MASTER in the director’s chair as much as in the screenwriter’s corner, bringing his usual visionary flair and artistic brilliance to craft yet more of his trademark IMAX-rocking BEAUTY and opulence, while his sneaky, snaky narrative shenanigans once again frame things in ingenious, challenging and sometimes emotionally DEVASTATING ways before we’re brought to the bittersweet denouement.  Tenet composer Ludwig Goransson’s expansive, evocative score is, ultimately, just the icing on the cake, making an already amazing film even more noteworthy.  If this ain’t the toast of the Awards Season they really didn’t pay attention …

5.  THE CREATOR – if ever there could be a film that would decry the state of the modern blockbuster blueprint, it’s this one.  Seriously, that fact that something THIS fresh and original could flop in a market so saturated with cookie-cutter franchises and exhausted expanded-universe IPs just says it all, doesn’t it?  Writer-director Gareth Edwards (along with screenwriter Chris Weitz, who previously worked with him on Rogue One) has had a look at our encroaching terror at the pervading rise of AI, taken a step back and looked at what COULD potentially happen if we actually end up OVERREACTING and blaming it for something which is actually entirely our fault … cue a troubling delve into a dystopian future where, after the accidental nuking of Los Angeles due to defence-Ai programming human error, the West has uniformly turned again artificial intelligence and set about waging an uncompromising war against it and the sentient androids it’s spawned.  These survivors have fled to the more sympathetic nations of New Asia, but the oppressive machinations of the Western coalition and their obsessive hunt for the AI’s creator, Nimata, have given birth to a terrifying weapon, the deadly orbital weapons platform NOMAD.  John David Washington is Joshua Taylor, a US Army sergeant who lost an arm and a leg in the LA blast, and then what innocence he had left in a subsequent ill-fated infiltration mission in New Asia, who’s drawn back into the fight by his former commanders when evidence emerges that his supposedly dead wife, Maya (an enjoyably complex turn from Gemma Chan), the daughter of Nimata he met and fell in love with on that mission, is still alive and in possession of a devastating weapon which they need to get hold of before it can be used to destroy the West.  Going in with a special forces team, Joshua discovers that this so-called weapon is actually Alphie, an android child (newcomer Madeleine Yuna) with the power to control electronic devices, and he finds that the truth is nothing like what was led to believe … Edwards and Weitz have created a spellbinding science-fiction MASTERPIECE here, a breathlessly thrilling and expansively EPIC science fiction war saga which takes some challenging and thought-provoking ideas and heavy themes and takes a very interesting direction in their interpretation while posing profound questions about the nature of humanity, morality and love, all while delivering a truly intoxicating masterclass in peerless world-building, brought to astonishing living, breathing reality through some of the most seamlessly engineered visual effects I have EVER seen in a feature film (then again, Edwards DID start out as a visual effects artist, so he knows the game INSIDE AND OUT).  Washington is an unusually complex, multi-layered hero as Joshua, fallible and driven by selfish desires but ultimately finding something much bigger than himself to believe in, while Yuna is a revelation, a sweet and inspiring little light in the darkness, while mighty support from the likes of Alison Janney, Ken Watanabe, Marc Manchaca (Ozark, The Outsider, No One Gets Out Alive) and Ralph Ineson rounds things out nicely.  Powerful, inventive, affecting and endlessly thought-provoking, this deserves to be remembered not only as one of the most rewardingly original and genuinely brilliant movies of 2023, but of the entire decade, and I think it’s a genuine crime it wasn’t a massive hit like it deserved to be.  Audiences really did SLEEP on this one …

4.  MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE – DEAD RECKONING, PART ONE – really, there should be NO SURPRISE that this topped off my list for the summer.  I may have grown up with James Bond, and I LOVE the Jason Bourne movies too, but the Tom Cruise-starring cinematic adaptation of the classic TV spy show has been MY ABSOLUTELY FAVOURITE espionage-based film franchise since JJ Abrams established the tried-and-tested formula for the series with 2006’s seminal classic third entry.  That being said, the franchise didn’t find its strongest voice until Cruise brought Jack Reacher writer-director Christopher McQuarrie (The Usual Suspects, The Way of the Gun) on board for the dynamite fifth instalment, Rogue Nation, which was so fucking brilliant and well received by both critics AND audiences that Paramount saw fit to retain his services on the EVEN BETTER follow-up, Fallout, which came DAMN CLOSE to equalling the heights of Sam Mendes’ Bond masterpiece Skyfall … so of course it was a NO-BRAINER for him to return once again for this two-part intended send-off for Cruise’s seemingly immortal superspy, Ethan Hunt, as he not only faces his deadliest foes to date, but also a very dark ghost from his own past.  As with its predecessor, this is another spy flick where knowing as little as possible going in works best for your enjoyment, suffice to say that this time Ethan and his loyal friends, master hacker Luther Stickel (the legendary Ving Rhames), tech wizard Benji Dunn (Simon Pegg) and former MI6 spook Ilsa Faust (Dune’s Rebecca Ferguson), really have their work cut out for them when they’re forced to go rogue yet again in order to track down and deactivate a supermassive AI program known as the Entity which has become fully self-aware, broken free of its constraints and is now wreaking havoc throughout the internet and beyond. 

Unfortunately this seemingly unstoppable digital force has enlisted the aid of a particularly dangerous “avatar” to represent its concerns in the real world, a mysterious terrorist known as Gabriel (Ozark’s Esai Morales) who seems to be following a dark agenda of his own.  The ensuing race against time takes in a grand tour of impressively picturesque locales, a collection of winningly well-written characters and a series of knuckle-whitening, visually arresting action sequences that have long since proven to be McQuarrie’s bread-and-butter just as much as his ingeniously twisty labyrinthine plots and sparky, sharp-witted quickfire dialogue, again showing that he really is THE VERY BEST filmmaker that Paramount could EVER have found for this franchise.  Needless to say, Cruise is as spectacular as ever in what really has become the very best role he’s EVER HAD, by this point basically just INHABITING Ethan’s easy charm, admirably solid, unswerving moral principles and truly INCREDIBLE physical prowess, delivering equally well in the truly insane stunt-work which WE KNOW FULL WELL IS ALL HIM as he does in the acting stakes; meanwhile Rhames, Pegg and Ferguson once again shine bright in their now comfortably well-established roles while still managing to bring fresh depths and interesting new arcs to their well-worn characters, we get a lot more of The Crown’s Vanessa Kirby’s intriguing notorious second-generation arms dealer Alanna Mitsopoulis/the White Widow, and it’s an IMMENSE pleasure to finally welcome back the first film’s prickly yet verbose antagonist Eugene Kitteridge (Henry Czerny), Ethan and Luther’s former boss in the IMF, in a far much expansive role this time round.  Meanwhile the franchise newcomers all impress as well, Morales easily proving to be the series’ VERY BEST VILLAIN to date as he menaces, seduces and murders his way through the story, brutally tearing our heroes’ lives apart as he pursues his mysterious master’s nefarious ends, while we get a brand new series heroine in the form of Grace (the MCU’s own Peggy Carter, Hayley Atwell), a sly and duplicitous professional thief who essentially stumbles into the thick of the action before becoming Ethan’s EXTREMELY unwilling accomplice; meanwhile there’s strong support from Shea Wigham and Greg Tarzan Davis (who previously worked with Cruise on Top Gun: Maverick) as Briggs and Degas, a pair of US Intelligence agents sent to chase down the rogue IMF crew, and Cary Elwes as Denlinger, a particularly duplicitous US Director of National Intelligence.  And then there’s Paris … ah Paris, my sweet, psychotic demon child.  Guardians of the Galaxy’s Pom Klementieff actually gets to be FRENCH again as Gabriel’s unpredictably lethal pet killer, and she’s an absolute JOY throughout, so delightfully unhinged that she makes every second of her screentime an undeniable pleasure, and as a result she’s BY FAR my favourite character in this.  Altogether, this is about as perfect as spy cinema gets, McQuarrie and his cast and crew working tirelessly to deliver not only the very best film in the series to date, but also the best film I saw all summer, very nearly my action cinema highlight of the whole year, and one of the VERY BEST spy movies I have EVER SEEN.  Given the shake-up from the Strikes it’s not clear if we’re REALLY gonna get to see Dead Reckoning Part Two in May 2025 like it’s been slated since getting pushed back from its summer ’24 release,but whenever it DOES finally arrive, I KNOW it’ll be worth the wait … it just has to be bloody INCREDIBLE to be better than THIS ONE …

3.  JOHN WICK CHAPTER 4 – and so, it has come to this … honestly, who’d have thunk it, back in 2014 when the first movie came out and (rightly) became a surprise sleeper hit that went a long way to revitalising Keanu Reeves’ career for a SECOND TIME as he found THE GREATEST ROLE HE’S EVER HAD, that almost a decade later it would’ve blown up into something THIS BIG?!!!  I mean sure, back then it definitely was The Little Movie That Could, but still … well, after two increasingly BIG sequels which each maintained a surprisingly impressive level of quality throughout, the fourth and final John Wick chapter is finally here, and GODS is it good.  I mean it’s FUCKING BRILLIANT.  It just might be THE BEST ONE YET.  Certainly it’s proving to be the most well received, landing BY FAR the best rating on Rotten Tomatoes and it genuinely seems like almost nobody has ANYTHING bad to say about this movie, even the CRITICS largely seem to LIKE this one.  And it deserves every lick of love it’s been getting, this is definitely both the pinnacle of the series AND a perfect swansong for the greatest assassin in cinema history.  I don’t wanna give too much away about the plot, even those who HAVE seen what’s come before shouldn’t be spoiled, even if these movies have never exactly been SHAKESPEARE in their construction they do still frequently leave you guessing in the best ways as to how they’ll turn out, and this one is definitely no exception.  I’ll just say that, after all the killing John’s done to get to this point, his one-man-war with the international criminal network’s High Table has finally reached its zenith as Winston (the great Ian McShane), the Manager of the newly-demolished Manhattan Continental Hotel, gives him the means to finally find a way to get out and find peace while he’s still alive – namely by challenging the Marquis Vincent de Gramont (Bill Skarsgard), a high-ranking Table member who’s taken it upon himself to rid the criminal underworld of the “cancer” that John and his constant disrespect have wrought, to single combat in a ritualistic duel in order to take his place at The Table should he win.  The

subsequent battle that ensues as John sets about facilitating this duel and the fallout that follows as he fights his way to that final, fateful meeting fuels the film in HIGH STYLE, so that even though this movie’s almost THREE HOURS LONG it never feels overlong or outstays its welcome.  Once again the cast are all ON FIRE, Reeves once again proving that he is just about THE BEST LOOKING and most interesting action star working in Hollywood today when he’s mowing down endless bad guys with a stoic expression and the odd deadpan response, the role once again VERY MUCH playing to his strengths, while McShane and Laurence Fishburne (returning once again as the dethroned Bowery King) are both on fine form throughout, and it’s both a pleasure and privilege but also a genuine heartbreaking SHAME to watch the late Lance Reddick deliver one of his very last performances as Charon, the noble and quietly charismatic Concierge of the Manhattan Continental (at least he also shot one more turn as the character for the upcoming Ana de Armas-starring spinoff feature Ballerina, so it’s not QUITE the end); meanwhile the newcomers all serve admirably as well, with Skarsgard particularly impressing as one of the franchise’s best villains to date, slimy, entitled and exquisitely arrogant, the kind of Big Bad you just LOVE to hate, Wynnona Earp’s Shamier Anderson is a delightful revelation as Mr Nobody, a precocious up-and-coming hitman talent who certainly has a whole lot of potential for a possible future spinoff franchise of his own within this larger universe, Donnie Yen excels as usual as Cain, a former friend of John’s that the Marquis brings out of forced retirement in order to take the unkillable Baba Yaga out (clearly the filmmakers saw his blind badass take in Rogue One and they were like yeah, let’s have a whole lot more of THAT), Hiroyuki Sanada once more delivers effortless class and cool gravitas as Koji, the honourable and principled Manager of the Osaka Continental, and Scott Adkins is viciously impressive but also thoroughly surprising in an almost unrecognisable prosthetic getup as Killa Harkan, the brutish Head of the High Table in Berlin.  In the end, though, we’re once again here primarily to MARVEL at all the action exploits on display while wallowing in some of the richest and most well-crafted world-building there’s EVER BEEN on the big screen – this is a thoroughly fascinating universe, realised with

exquisite precision with so many cool little winks and nods and in-jokes to make the geeks among us grin and chuckle with sheer joy over the immense bounty on display, while veteran stuntman-turned-director Chad Stahelski once again wrangles some of the VERY BEST cinematic action EVER COMMITTED TO FILM in a series of astonishing and punishing set-pieces bravely executed with nary a visual effect in sight.  There are almost TOO MANY cool action beats in this movie to count, although the final BIG sequence, in which John fights his way up the spectacular but infamously punishing Stairs of Montmartre in Paris against an endless onslaught of thugs all determined to not let him reach the top, which includes one of the BIGGEST belly laughs I have EVER HAD at the cinema in my life, as much just over the joke’s sheer, ingenious AUDACITY, has to be the film’s undeniable highlight (closely followed by a genuinely INSANE run/gun/drive chase/shootout/fight sequence through the sheer chaos of the traffic around the Arc de Triomphe – every single one of these sequences is thrilling, they’re adrenaline fuelled and each crafted with such precision but also brilliantly varied inventiveness that it NEVER leads to vicarious battle fatigue.  Best of all, though, as with the previous film’s there’s a surprising amount of soul and heart and heft to the film too, which ultimately leads to a climax which is both immensely satisfying but also pretty devastating in its emotional power.  Altogether then, this was EASILY my action movie of the year, a fitting climax to an franchise which has come to SET THE BENCHMARK for this entire genre, and, honestly, just a damn fine movie in its own right.

2.  NO ONE WILL SAVE YOU – the scariest movie I saw in 2023 is a very strange beast indeed, a genuinely original and very leftfield piece of work despite tackling one of the most classic movie plot tropes out there – the alien invasion of a small American town.  What makes this such a noteworthy piece of work is that this film plays almost ENTIRELY without dialogue … SERIOUSLY, throughout the entire film’s run there’s only a SINGLE line of actual spoken dialogue delivered by its lead, the rest of the film relies entirely on sound effects and Joseph Trapanese’s atmospheric score alongside visual storytelling cues to gets its narrative across.  It’s an incredibly brave prospect and one which I’ll admit I wasn’t even EXPECTING when I first sat down to watch Hulu’s most blindingly successful offering of the past year, it kind of snuck up on me realising that nobody was actually SAYING anything, but I still knew EXACTLY what was happening.  This is because there’s ONE HELL of a writer-director at the helm of this project – I’ve been a big fan of Brian Duffield for a while now, having really loved his screenplay work in The Babysitter, Underwater and Love & Monsters, so when he dropped his actual FEATURE DIRECTING DEBUT in the middle of the Pandemic with 2020’s ingenious jet black teen comedy horror Spontaneous I was already onboard and in the aftermath simply COULD NOT WAIT to see what he’d do once he got his hands on a budget decent enough to actually deliver the kind of films he’d already been WRITING.  But even so, this one STILL left me shocked by just HOW FUCKING AMAZING it actually is, seriously, this is almost certainly THE MOST IMPRESSIVE movie I’ve seen in the past year, and DEFINITELY its most important from a filmmaking standpoint.  The story itself revolves almost EXCLUSIVELY around a slightly odd young woman named Brynn (Booksmart and Dopesick’s Kaitlyn Dever) living a seemingly idyllic but ultimately lonely life in her isolated home on the outskirts of a small town which seems to have universally shunned her for some initially unknown past crime … which means that she knows full well that there will, indeed, be NO ONE coming to her rescue when, one night, an alien walks into her home and starts tearing the place up using devastating telekinetic powers.  She

manages to escape after accidentally killing the creature, but this simply makes things worse as, when morning comes, she discovers that the whole town is in the middle of a subtle but TERRIFYING alien invasion and that they seem to have marked her as a particular threat.  From this beautifully simple starting point, Duffield has crafted a simply PERFECT scary movie, exquisitely paced and relentlessly driven as we hit the ground running the moment night falls after that initial time taken to establish Brynn’s place in the story, and he never lets off the brakes again until we reach the end.  This is a genuinely TERRIFYING piece of sci-fi horror, with the varied creatures in particular presented in impressively near flawless standards of CGI which really should be used as a major benchmark moving forward with the artform, while the frequent and substantial knuckle-whitening set-pieces are executed with a precision that verges on the simply RUTHLESS throughout.  It all plays out with a surprising denouement which feels cathartically PERFECT for everything that came before once you think about it a little, and the whole endeavour is aided ENORMOUSLY by the MASSIVE contribution of the film’s star herself – this is essentially a one woman show, and Dever easily proves the equal of the task, delivering an immensely potent performance that makes the striking lack of dialogue an ultimate significant VIRTUE since she’s able to convey SO MUCH with just a look, no matter the scene, so you find yourself latching onto her in the first ten minutes, meaning that when it goes from bad to worse to truly NIGHTMARISH you’re thoroughly invested in her desperate fight for survival.  This really is a star-making role, and I don’t doubt she’s due for a MAJOR raise in her profile moving forward … altogether this is a genuine MASTERPIECE, easily one of the undeniable HIGHLIGHTS of the past cinematic year and a great sign of things to come, one would hope, should the rest of Hollywood take notice.  Only time will tell … in the meantime take my advice, check it out and experience something TRULY SPECIAL …

1.  DUNGEONS & DRAGONS: HONOUR AMONG THIEVES – so what, then, could POSSIBLY have beaten such astounding fare to the top spot this time round?  If you’d asked me that at the year’s start I DEFINITELY wouldn���t have thought it could be THIS … I mean SURE, I love D&D as much as the next geek, but even so this felt like SUCH a shameless cinematic cash-grab from Wizards of the Coast and Disney (producing through Paramount) that I felt there was NO WAY it could REALLY be an actual GOOD FILM.  At best I was expecting to be mildly entertained by a serviceable guilty pleasure, something that’s good for a Saturday night-in with a pizza and a six pack, not a genuine MASTERPIECE of cinematic adaptation.  And yet, it turns out that’s EXACTLY what we got – this film has ONE HUNDRED PERCENT clearly been made with the utmost love and respect for the source material because the only possible interpretation for the way they wrote this was by taking Player’s and Dungeon Master’s handbooks, a Monster Manual, some character sheets and a few dice bags and just turning the mini-campaign that ensued into a two-hour screenplay.  It’s clear that they are heavily steeped in respect and knowledge of the game itself, or were at least CONSTANTLY advised by experts who are, because this movie is AT EVERY STEP a pretty much PERFECT representation of the Forgotten Realms setting, the bestiary and even the game mechanics themselves IN ACTION, and it EVEN colours the way that the plot is laid out, how the characters interact and how some of the action sequences go.  (Seriously – a perfectly executed knockout on a knife-wielding hostage taker with a hurled potato?  That’s the Barbarian’s player landing a Natural 20 Critical Hit on their Attack Roll.  It love it.)  Sure, the results are likely to INFURIATE some people who think a little too highly about how FORMALLY WRITTEN their cinema should be, but for most folk this actually makes for a refreshingly honest and pretty unique piece of cinematic storytelling that actually works DAMN NEAR PERFECTLY from start to finish.  It also helps that the writer-director duo in

charge here are a pair of stalwart comedy movie veterans, namely Jonathan Goldstein and John Francis Daly of Horrible Bosses, Vacation and Spider-Man: Homecoming fame, whose extremely enjoyable previous directorial collab Game Night actually likely provided a useful throughline for them to get into tackling this one.  The main cast of dysfunctional heroes we follow through the story are even put together like a typical motley band of player characters – Chris Pine once again proves that he’s at his best when he’s doing broad comedy, thoroughly delightful as self-centred, opportunistic roguish Bard Edgin Darvis who, along with his platonic partner, tough-but-fair and sweetly naïve Barbarian warrior Holga Kilgore (played to absolute PERFECTION by Michelle Rodriguez in what’s UNDOUBTEDLY the best role she’s ever had, and definitely my FAVOURITE character here), enlists the help of bumbling, neuroses-riddled half-elf Sorcerer Simon Aumar (Pokémon Detective Pikachu’s Justice Smith, twitchy, unsure of himself and UTTERLY adorable) and shape-shifting Tiefling Druid Doric (It’s Sophia Lillis, forthright, dependable and immediately done with all of Edgin’s shit) to help them knock over the accumulated fortune of their one-time colleague, Rogue-turned-nobleman Forge Fitzwilliam (Hugh Grant once again expertly bringing home the scheming sleaze persona he’s perfected in more recent years now he’s finally said goodbye to his earlier days as an upper class heartthrob) and foil the dastardly machinations of the monstrous undead Red Wizard Sofina (a genuinely chilling and unsettling turn from Shadow & Bone’s Daisy Head); meanwhile there’s a top-notch supporting cast of “DM-controlled NPCs” that help the story flow and breathe as effortlessly as the main stars, from Bridgerton’s Rege-Jean Page as deliciously dry Paladin Xenk Yendar, the obviously-overpowered PC from another campaign that the DM brings in to help the party out when things go COMPLETELY WRONG for them, and Chloe Coleman (Gunpowder Milkshake) as Edgin’s estranged young daughter Kira, to Bradley Cooper in a truly INSPIRED and genuinely hilarious cameo as Holga’s decidedly diminutive ex-husband Marlamin.  Every single one of these is a well-rounded, living-and-breathing vital person in their own right, and the writers have crafted them and their misadventures with proper precision throughout, while the world has been realised with genuine skill and clear loving attention to detail, as well as a welcome reliance on real sets and locations and good old fashioned physical make-up and animatronics over pure digital effects wherever possible.  There are some pretty spectacular action sequences on offer here (the Underdark sequence with a decidedly overweight dragon is a particular highlight, although my personal favourite has to be the scene in which Doric has to pull off an unexpected escape by Wildshaping between different animal forms, all unfolding in a spectacular unbroken “single” take), but in the end this film is, first and foremost, a COMEDY, and while there’s plenty of heart and pathos on offer, as well as more than a little genuine DARKNESS here and there, ultimately almost everything is VERY MUCH played for laughs, and the end result is definitely the funniest film I encountered this past year.  It’s also just about the most effortlessly ENDEARING film I’ve come across in a very long time, and I have to admit I am SO GLAD that it managed to defy my low expectations SO MUCH, I feel VERY HAPPILY HUMBLED that I was proved SO WRONG this time round.  I’m genuinely hopeful that we get LOADS MORE of this going forward, I’d love a whole campaign’s worth of movies to grow out of this humble one-shot.  Best get those D20s rolling again, guys!

[toa-archive]

Bellroc Design Path

As per Anon request there's going to be three posts regarding the Arcane Order consisting of any and all concept art we have of them. As ever with these it is far from impossible something else will belatedly turn up. Should this occur (And in this specific case would not be surprised), wherever it is added will have a [/edit xx/xx/xxxx] which includes a date marker. Just makes it easier to find the "new" thing :)

Also per Anon request we're starting with Bellroc! As a fun bonus fact, the voice meandering from masc to femme is both really cool and a Angel of Death from Hellboy reference. Particularly in this climate, we support non-binary they/them wrongs. So let's get to it!

First up is some initial concepts from Yingjue Chen! While this was originally figuring out Nari and thus forest themed, the left most one was repurposed into a fire wizard. Never went any further of course but still very neat to see how just changing some shapes and adding colour make something fresh from old ideas.

Source

Francisco Ruiz Velasco had his own stab at a bunch of wizards which are nigh impossible to pin down if it was for any of the Arcane Trio specifically or not. Still important to include tho :) This one will very understandably appear in all three.

Source goes to Linkedin so may require an account.

Then seemingly all of a sudden Bellroc as we know them pops up, also by Francisco Ruiz Velasco, who would finalise their design. This is a crop from a height chart shown during the Art of Wizards panel and when you compare it to the artwork below (Also from the panel), they do seem to get tightened up considerably.

Now this was uploaded outside the panel as well, which is great as can see it at a decent size, though does lacks one sketch and the specifics of their eyes. It's very possible that someone else drew/painted those though who if that is the case is currently unknown.

Source

The next one to appear is their texture markup by Isaac Orloff! This is an absolute goldmine for your reference needs, particularly all their little details.

Source

Decided to add a trio of bonuses just for fun. You might have noticed the Order pops up in the Wizards credits sequence though unlike Trollhunters and 3Below, it is not Headless Studios. They were drawn in a similar way though! They are by Alison Donato.

Source

Ivan Gozali, who boarded on Wizards, had a bunch of Bellroc sketches on his website which were likely related to boards he may have done that are not public. Sadly, said sketches suddenly vanished one day and to date only one of these has been recovered. This is a good a time as any to show it.

This is also a great excuse to yet again break out Francisco Ruiz Velasco's Order band poster again! In part due to them only appearing in colour keys for RotT otherwise. Well, there's one exception but want to save it for it's own post...

Source goes to Linkedin so may require an account.

Can't forget Bellroc's staff! Presumably it was modeled after Fruiz's design as Alison Donato mentions her texture work here was painted over a blank. Unlike the other two which do have 2D reference art for the design, it's not been seen publicly at this time.

Source

On the more magical front there is a tiny screenshot from the Art of Wizards panel which shows the magic effects for Bellroc. It is unknown who the right two images belong to however -

We do have a bigger version of the left image which we know is by Yingjue Chen! Aren't effects neat?

Source

[/Edit 13/02/2025] The following was missed due to no obvious note of what it is on the original tweet this version is from and it's being added in now. This is the spell effect combining Bellroc, Skrael and the Green Knight's power into a single shot! It is by Isaac Orloff.

Source

Poking Rise of the Titans a moment, thanks to Andy Murray we have the glow up eye effect for Bellroc. This has been cropped from a larger image for fitting this post reasons only. Have to scroll back up for the Wizards version!

Source

And for fun since we also have it, this is the Arcane Circle for Bellroc which is shown on the Fire Titan including the Genesis Seal marker. As above it has been cropped for fitting this post reasons only. This time they are by Sean Wang.

Source

To close up a fun little tidbit! Thanks to Bianca Siercke we have the temporary name for Bellroc before they became, well, Bellroc. It was Belrog!

Source

When all three posts are up there will be a link here to the other two members. For now it is a placeholder:

Bellroc - Nari - Skrael

[enby-ernhardt]

Some things I’d like to see in the KOTOR remake(s), assuming they actually get released. I know some of it is a bit idealistic, but I can dream 😆

More customisation: maybe your character has a larger body, or freckles, or the braided hairstyle but blonde. They’re Twilek, Mirialan, or Zabraki! Non binary! Asexual! Anything goes, babey!!

Improved graphics and animation: ok, this is practically a given, but still. Have you seen characters get killed, then stand back up so they can die properly? Or characters knocked down when frozen getting back up and re-freezing (in that ridiculous pose) 😆. Revan’s dance moves stay, obviously, they’re just smoother.

Companions can roam ship/have schedules: Mostly they’ll be where they are now, but sometimes you’ll find Atton taking a nap, or Mission at the food replicator, and so on. Maybe you’ll even see someone patching themselves up in the med bay after a particularly rough battle.

Seperate the first name/last name fields: Sometimes I find a good first name but want to randomise the last. Also, giving every character my full name whilst trying to stay under the radar is counterintuitive. 😄

Romance: make Carth and Bastila bi, improve Juhani’s romance options (keep her a lesbian though), and add romance to the Kotor 2 characters (and Canderous in K1 because I know some people want that). You should be able to turn them down at any point though if you want.

Hide weapons unless fighting: We’ve all had a character stab themself when meditating or something. Also this

Small decorations: just having little trinkets and stuff appear throughout the game as you complete various tasks. Maybe you could keep one gizka, or pazzak cards/credits stack up as you win more games, or you get a sticker saying “Visit Manaan!”, etc.

Containers say when empty: this one is just here because I’m stupid and can’t remember shit 😆

[K1] Change Tach sound: those seconds between descending into the shadowlands and finding the mute button are the longest seconds of my life. (I know there’s mods, but they aren’t available on console)

[K1] Influence system/relationship changes: It really doesn’t make sense that Carth and Bastila will watch you do something dark sided and just make a small comment before pretending it never happened. Lightside companions should become more wary of you the darker you get, with Bastila giving you more lectures, for example.

[K1] Solo/not mc sections: I really like these sections in Kotor 2, so it’d be nice to have some in the first one too. Maybe someone could deal with the Mandalorian raiders while you’re training as a Jedi, or Canderous does the Genoharadan quest. Or entirely new stuff.

[K1] Change equipment on the Hawk: Also from Kotor 2. It’s very annoying to keep taking characters off the ship just to give them better stuff

[K1] Cutscenes on ship: yet another thing from Kotor 2. Carth asking Bastila how she got captured, Carth and Canderous’ Warrior or Soldier discussion, and Mission asking Bastila about using the force for fun could all easily take place on the ship, along with other convos.

[K2] references to/import data from K1: I’d like to see people talk about the time Revan saved/destroyed Hrakert rift and affected the kolto, or about them being swoop champ, and stuff like that.

[K2] Finished product: all the stuff the Restored Content Mod deals with should be there from the beginning, no need for mods or dlc *cough* Switch port *cough*. I know we’re going to mod the game anyway, but it should be for fun stuff and minor bug fixes, not restoring half the game!

[missnobodymadness]

Welcome to my place, any similarities with an asylum are pure coincidence.

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I'm Miss Nobody, a 33 years old person who loves creating, sharing and read about original characters, with a strong preference for fan characters. English is not my first language and I am far from having a perfect grammar, I feel like this is important information considering that I write a lot about my characters. I consider myself a non-binary person and I feel comfortable with any pronouns.

⚠️ This blog may contain mature content occasionally and while never visually explicit I still feel like this deserves a warning, especially if you don't like cussing, I cuss a lot! Proceed with caution, you have been warned.⚠️

✔ Things I like ✔

❥ Art ❥ Anime ❥ TV shows ❥ Music ❥ Wajas ❥ Sharks and orcas

✪ Fandoms ✪

They are too many to list but I'm listing the main ones here, no order of preference.

➤ Attack On Titan* Favorites: Hange, Reiner, Pieck, Gabi ➤ Naruto* Favorites: Madara, Obito, Shikamaru, Jiraiya ➤ Spy x Family Favorites: Yor, Anya, Sylvia, Twilight/Loid ➤ Chainsaw Man Favorites: Makima, Himeno, Power, Kobeni ➤ Jujutsu Kaisen Favorites: Suguru Geto, Maki, Toji, Mahito ➤ Pokémon Favorites: Cynthia, N, Team Rocket, Gary ➤ Berserk (Manga only) Favorites: Serpico, Skull Knight, Guts, Farnese ➤ The Walking Dead Favorites: Michonne, Ezekiel, Tara, Alpha ➤ Game Of Thrones Favorites: Tyrion, Daenerys, Sam, Arya ➤ MCU Favorites: Loki, Tony Stark, Hela, Jessica Jones ➤ The Lion King* Favorites: Zira, Scar, Vitani, Nuka * = Main obsessions.

♥ My ships ♥

I enjoy shipping a lot and think it is an important part of my blog as I reblog these a lot, before following, please, check this list, I don't have time for drama and I won't start any over ships I don't like either, I'm here to have fun.

❥ Levi x Hange (Attack on Titan)* ❥ Levi x Hange x Erwin (Attack On Titan) ❥ Ymir x Historia (Attack On Titan) ❥ Loid x Yor (Spy x Family)* ❥ Hashirama x Madara (Naruto) ❥ Nami x Vivi (One Piece) ❥ Re-L x Vincent (Ergo Proxy) ❥ Jiraiya x Tsunade (Naruto) ❥ Kazuki x Rei (Buddy Daddies) ❥ Haruka x Michiru (Sailor Moon) ❥ Cara x Kahlan (Legend Of The Seeker) ❥ Jon Snow x Sam (Game Of Thrones) ❥ Daenerys x Tyrion (Game Of Thrones) ❥ Sam x Eileen (Supernatural) ❥ Linda x Mazikeen (Lucifer) ❥ Jesus x Aaron (The Walking Dead) ❥ Tara x Denise (The Walking Dead) ❥ Abraham x Eugene (The Walking Dead) ❥ Alicent x Rhaenyra (House Of The Dragon) ❥ Stede x Black Beard (Our Flag Means Death)

* = Currently obsessed with

♥ My OC X Canon ships ♥

Warning: This blog contains OC x Canon ships and loves these, if you don't like these, don't follow.

❥ Myline x Itachi Uchiha (Naruto) ❥ Evelyn x Reiner Braun (Attack On Titan)* ❥ Evelyn x Pieck Finger (Attack On Titan) ❥ Aisha x Tony Stark (MCU) ❥ Jiyū x Suguru Geto (Jujutsu Kaisen)*

* = Unrequited love, I have a thing for tragic love stories. :C

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✎ My characters ✎

I have lots of original characters, from original stories to fandoms, all of my humanoids are fan characters, while all of my ferals are from my original story called "Cursed Scars".

I've listed most of my characters on this page and each one of them has a hashtag on my blog where you can see and find out more about each individual character of mine, I tried my best to make it easy to navigate!

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Important notes:

• No DNI as I find these very useless, at most they will make you an easy target for suspicious people.

• I do not answer private messages, these make me extremely uncomfortable as I suffer from social anxiety.

• I don't draw often as drawing makes my mental health decline a lot, I don't consider myself an artist, I draw very occasionally only.

• Some of my fan fics and original stories have very sensitive topics, it does NOT mean that I am okay or support any of these in real life, I'm not a murderer for writing about a murderer.

• I don't support or tolerate any kind of bullying or harassment over fictional ships, I couldn't care less if you ship the opposite of what I ship, you are free to and no one should be treated like shit for that, I have zero tolerance for this kind of behavior and I'd probably kick your face if I could. I ship Levihan but I ain't getting mad at Eruri, it's that simple, thank you.

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Working on a page for my characters, I shall edit this post to add the link to it once I am done.

[grapecaseschoices]

hey😊!! , for the RO jumble asks -

Alana x G or/and Victoria??

Josnel x August ??

Okay. So. Fun fact. Alana probably was the biggest of my lot that was G Reigns' fan. [I mean maybe not the biggest ... Ori and Hiyam are up there, but she was A FAN!] But then Griffin being themselves and Alana being a sweet, hard working, lamby pie .... yeah. The stars are starting to fall.

And I feel the placement of Vic [a fellow rosy-coded romantic scorned by love ... you see where this is going?] searching for help might further sour Alana to Griffin. Thinking on it, I would have to play it to be sure, but I feel Alana might very well be the one of mine to more likely split up ValenReign by stealing Griffin's woman 23werwer

Which is funny because Alana doesn't realize she is quite bi yet. She's dated men. She knows she loves fem!Seven because Seven is SEVEN and of course she will always love Seven and -- oh. Okay. But Victoria is different. So it would be such a mess between the self-discovery and the adultery ... okay, maybe not so funny. At all.

So, it could happen but I don't think it could work. In the sense that Alana, would be miserable in such a circumstance [I THINK. But then she's SUCH a fool for love that maybe she wouldn't? Maybe it woudl be worth it?]. But she would convince herself she was happy. Because Victoria WOULD choose her if she could.

What is needed is for Alana to see what a sad sack G really is .... than maybe. It woudl be bumpier because Alana is determined to stay away from dude's like G. Who are heartbreakers qwerwq ... so. ROFLMAO. Though as much as I don't very often play adultery routes -to each their own - I sorta like this bc Alana is the princess often, the home-maker type. Like very ~Cater2U~. But that tendency to bend backwards for love would make her the knight here, the home-wrecker.

Alana you're Lancelot! *sobs*

... dang after this nothing I say about Josnel and August could hold up. Like this is wild. I am really tempted to give it a shot. BUT I SHOULDNT. I dont need more circulation for infamous. No more pinboards! [Funnily I figured if it wasnt Seven it would be August for Alana.]

But sigh. Okay. Josnel and August. This would be another gender dating exploration, because I don't think Jose has ever dated someone who identified as non-binary. To be fair I don't think he's dated a lot of men either .... it's been Seven.

This would be so interesting. My appeal for Seb [it was originally Orion] was because how different he was from Seven but also how NORMAL he was. So, I think August's desire to be in a band AND his political parents would sort of be a rub ... for Josnel. Like a bad rub. Because he doesn't really want this long term, at this point.

I do think they could be a sweet couple. Particularly feel August as an unexpected sorta sweep you off your feet, understated way, that would really keep on catching Josnel off guard. Especially because, for some reason, in his mind he sees August as a Younger. LOL. So there woudl also be THAT to get over.

So, I do think they would be lovely and I am just GRINNING pondering it. I feel it would be better in a world where the only hang ups were like perception [mostly Jose's] and not like ... careers. Because that's different. And strangely more difficult in this case.

[theskeletoninthegarden]

Please excuse me while I ramble for too long. (also, bless, ilysm)

I'm so wild for my sweet jam jelly bean that I made them a playlist.

I adore my moonflower-foxglove-hyacinth bouquet so much I finished and released one fic, and I've worked on three since.

But a short run down would be:

Name: Quinntav Moonwaltz;

Gender: Non-Binary, They/Them;

Class: Fighter, Eldritch Knight (in game), Blood Hunter (personal canon);

Alignment: Chaotic Good;

Background: Charlatan (in game), Circus Performer (canon)

And a terribly longer, not very canon compliant story would be the following (this will have Dark Urge spoilers, with an enormous amount of liberty taken on my behalf for canon lore).

In 1411 DR[1] Quinntav Moonwaltz was born to a Moon Elf mother, a follower of Selûne whom lived a humble life in a farming community of the Moonshae Isles, and a traveling performer. They were given the name Nodel, "moon child", and lived with their mother as a local oddity within the village.

People called them the moon child, the stray in the street, the bastard. They saw her ears, her narrow chin, her voice. They saw themself.

An attack on the village at an unknown date resulted in their displacement, and the loss of the only family they had ever known. Trauma has frayed and matted these earliest memories for Quinn, but what found them were followers of the debased god Bhaal: their most unholy progenitor.

For forty years Quinn existed within the halls of Bhaal's temples, living alongside the masked faces of his followers, and knowing only one person dearly in truth, Orin the Red, their sister in creation. At a young age Quinn questioned everything in their small world: their anatomy, their gender, their dear sister's ravenous needs, and their near mythological father's ultimate desires for them. They were a living, breathing fail safe, to exist beyond him following his destruction during what was known as the Bhaalspawn Crisis of 1369 DR.

Before they would be known as the Dark Urge, Quinn, daughter of Bhaal, was trained well in the arts of murder-craft. In not only taking lives, but making it an art form, all in the name of her dear father. But she recognized in herself quickly the lack of pleasure that came from hurting others, this flaw in their core as a child of Bhaal, and though she reveled in the fight, they began to hate the slaughter.

Orin would call her weak, soft, a wilting flower locked in their glass cage of self-pity.

Through some allowance of her butler she was allowed to leave the temple of Bhaal for minutes at a time. And, eventually, given one night to herself to find and drag back a lamb to the temple to sacrifice in her father's name.

Quinn was merely happy to see the world beyond, to see the Gate, and it was on this night that she met the first of the party, Astarion Anucion. The two would forget this meeting, it would be decades before the truth was revealed. But as she was Astarion's target, the Vampire was her's. Unfortunately, or fortunately for them both, when the night would culminate in the upper levels of the Gate, within the standing stones of it's graveyard, Quinn would stay her hand in taking his life. For the first time in her existence, she recognized something of herself in another, and said her goodbye.

This failure would result in a severe punishment, a pain and disdain on their person that would trigger her evolution as the creature known as the Dark Urge.

The Dark Urge was a fearsome Hunter, a lover of blood sport and cruel mockery, a witty bastard not with dreams of power, but fantasies of a world where he could play, and play, and play without ever feeling like himself a victim again. Rival and brother to Orin, the two found their fun in creating elaborate schemes of destruction, but whereas his sister fancied quick bouts of mayhem, he could enjoy the long game. It was in this that he met Enver Gortash, and the two created a plan. The Dark Urge would reign terror on the Gate, taking the lives of innocents for fourteen days and fourteen nights, and at it's peek, Enver would step in, putting down the scourge of the Gate and becoming, for all intents and purposes, a hero to the people.

The plan was thwarted when Orin, in her bid to remove a piece from their infernal game, ambushed the Dark Urge in the streets, and nearly put him down. Just nearly. She succeeded in removing the Dark Urge, but in his place...awoke someone else.

Quinntav Moonwaltz was found in the rain soaked streets of Baldur's Gate by one Lucretious, the Ring Master of the Circus of the Last Days. Near on their last breath, they were saved through the joint efforts of the Necromancer and her friends, a Dryad with her tinctures by the name of Zethino, and a Mummy with her love called Zara. Together, the three woman not only brought them back from the brink, but gave them a new life entirely, as a foundling of the Circus.

It was Zara among the three that they were closest to, the Mummy being dubbed their "Circus Mother" by Lucretious, and to whom they would learn Common Sign for in order to listen to her words of wisdom.

“Zethino and Lully kept me alive, but it was Zara who put me back together. I didn’t have anything to go off when I woke up; I wouldn’t have half my personality or a quarter of my wardrobe if it wasn’t for her.”

Through Lucretious they learned the arts of speech craft and magic. Through Dryad alchemy and, frankly, how to brew a wonderful cup of tea. And with Zara how to use paint and stitch to hide themself among any crowd by standing out the loudest. But there were others, too: Medrash and Glingo, loving husbands that made them both master musician and rope walker, respectively; Poppy, whom they helped raise from infancy into a fine purveyor of treasure; Akabi, whom taught them slight of hand in every form; and Dribbles, who helped them master the art of a good joke, if at the cost of some of their dignity.

It was a year into their life as a performer that the past would come back to haunt them, when a young small Tiefling by the name of Alfira would join them in a duet...and it would nearly cost her life. In the night after their revelry, while the musician took rest within the camp as a guest, the Dark Urge woke. If not for the rousing of the beast Shadow-Heart, sensing a predator in the dark, he may not have been discovered before it was too late. A warning was given by he Displacer Beast, and action taken by Zethino, who used her spores to subdue the Dark Urge before he could succeed in his mission.

When Quinntav would wake, they would be caged and horrified, not only the memories of the night but their intent roiling in their head like a storm. They had meant to kill her, to dress their neck in her innards, and feast on her blood. Disgusted by themself, but needing answers, they would ask Lucretious for help...and she would provide. For the sake of the safety of her family, Lucretious had long since done her research, and she had an answer: they were a child of Bhaal, and despite her hope, it seemed that their dark past was catching up with them.

But the Ring Master would not banish them from the Circus. Instead, she created a cage: a bespelled, iron thing that would sit within their gifted abode, for every member of the Circus was eventually given a pocket room to carry...and their's came in the form of a coffin.

Quinn smiled wanly, both pained and self deprecating, "I remember looking at it and thinking, "This will be my grave. How fitting"."

After the attempt on Alfira's life, the Dark Urge would wake with every bout of unconsciousness Quinntav faced. When they slept, they did so in their cage. When they napped, they used Zethino's teas to put them into a slumber so deep not even their "other half" could crawl his way out. And so it went, for years. While they learned to swallow swords, juggle fire, they found love in the husbands, and began to understand their own sexuality [2].

“Az, what I mean is that the two of us are friends, if I should be so bold as to say. We’ve fought together, squabbled, talked shit, but I think it’s far too soon for me to even consider the possibility that you would be interested in sleeping with me-!” "...I’m not yet looking for a long term commitment right now what with turning into a squid and all, but I’m not very well looking for a quick fuck, either. My songs about sex, Astarion, they’re just for a laugh! But if I ever, truly want to sleep with anyone, it comes after a long period of knowing the person, loving the person, and, for the most part, being told they feel the same.” (From "Hunter and Hunted")

"There was one anniversary I helped them have some fun. It was their first actually with the troupe and their twentieth together. A gift, you know, between friends... "I was with them in the Circus for eight years. It took me two weeks to fall in love, and three years to get the itch, as the poets call it... "Sex is fun and all when I want to give back, and I mean give back to a well and truly good friend. But wanting it for myself? That's another plot entirely." They snorted. "Or at least a different act." (From "The Hanged Man")

But though they loved them dearly, what they yearned for near to more then their exorcism was emotional fulfillment. For love.

“With the way you speak of these husbands it almost seems as though you would have been the third wheel to their little ride if given the chance." "I…I'm not sure really. I certainly spent some time with them. Between Glingo teaching me how to walk the wire and the both of them working with me in music, it's possible. But with the Durge present, I'll never completely know." (From "An Act of Mercy")

“We weren’t together, it wasn’t a frequent thing. Just sometimes. And they, they just,” they waved a hand, “You’re not my therapist, Az, I’m not going to spill it all out for you to have to fucking digest. They said it was fine as long as it never became a problem. They went to their bed at night, and I…” “The cage. You went to the cage. They treated you as a play thing to be used and tossed aside whenever they wanted." (From "The Hanged Man")

A decade into their time with the Circus they would return to Baldur's Gate. Before their grand act during the four day stay, they would walk the allies each night and look for signs of where they had previously died. Along the way, they caught the eye of a certain Cazador Szaar, who, through a certain Enver Gortash, was notified that a child of Bhaal would be walking the streets. Cazador sent his best to track down whom Enver assumed was the Dark Urge, and to whom Astarion would merely be one in a long line of his Lord's victims. Alas, when the two would meet again, Astarion would be so stricken with the sweetness of "the dear boy" that the vampire would go against his Lord's wishes...and let "him" go [3].

Unaware of Astarion's dismal fate, Quinntav would leave the Gate, wondering what had become of the vampire, and for years after they would continue their pseudo life on the road. They were content, if not happy. Everything changed when the machinations of the Dread Three would come to fruition.

Quinntav was stolen from the Circus during one of their many stops throughout Faerune by the Illithid dreadnought.

What followed would be the events of the game, and more.

There would be their reunion with Karlach, whom they met on the road during a tour with Enver, who they found family in, and whom they would correspond with before she was stolen away via demonic pact.

There would be them properly meeting Wyll, who recognized them from their place in the Circus, and whom they struck up an immediate friendship with, if no insignificant amount of adoration for.

There would be Gale, who would help forge for them a ring capable of putting them into a dreamless sleep each night as the cage once did before.

There would be Shadowheart, who, unknown to them, they would see echoes of their old self in from a life long ago.

There would be Lae'zel, who would remind them of a sister they could no longer recall, but whom the Emperor took the face of each time they slept as their Dream Visitor.

And there would be Astarion, whom they would forge a pact of blood with. With whom would be the first lover to ever choose to remain in their bed at night with little fear of the dark creature within them. With whom they would find equal footing with in their struggles to fight the corruption done to them by their individual abusers and their own cloying, terrible temptations.

Along the way they would meet again with Raphael, their pact holder, to which they would give the crown in return for the removal of the parasites from the party. They would face Orin, their forgotten sister, and fight Enver Gortash, their once ally, and defeat them both with the aid of their friends. They would throw down and spit in the face of the legacy of their horrible father, and face the Absolute at last [4].

Following the events of the Absolute, Quinntav and Astarion would would face the immediate issue: helping the freed Spawn of Cazador begin their unlives in the Underdark. With aid of the Gur Hunters, but also due to Quinn allying with the Mycanoid Circle, this would be easier said then done, but not impossible.

Through what I would mark as a "romance quest" in the game, Quinntav commissioned a ring from Gale called the Shield of Dekarios, and with some testing done, it, more or less, made Astarion highly resistant to the effects of radiant damage, and etc.

"Gale? Has something happened." "The Shield is a failure." Astarion felt something in him flinch back. He hadn't been aware that it was there. Never for a moment had he considered that he had begun to hope. And yet. "I suppose even men with entire towers to themselves can draw short sometimes." "I…apologize." He opened the box, revealing the ring within. Something Astarion could barely bring himself to look at it. It was gold, with a distinct inscription of an eye, it's lashes radiating out like the rays of a sun, a line drawn through it and turning it into a horizon, while a tear drop fell from it's center pupil. "It's powers are sadly limited. I could not make one that granted complete immunity, only one that provides high resistance." "Pardon?" "Direct prolonged exposure will gradually result in a terrible sun burn, followed by more extreme damage. One could possibly wear a veil and hat, perhaps some sort of mesh like clothing, and extend the period. But in cases like the Baldurain summer one can only, at best, depend on six hours of comfort. Anything beyond will irritate, then sear, then cook. "I tried also to get around the matter of flowing water, but you would still be expected to feel some drowsiness in both circumstances! Swimming for very long would likely cause muscle cramping, on top of lethargy, and after an hour the exact thing we were trying to avoid! "...Don't get me started on that invitation business! I think it would work, but I'm not certain. Knowing my luck it would lead to a massive headache, if a belated ejection from the sight entirely!" Quinntav burst out into laughter, giggling into the table as the Wizard purpled beside them. "That is unnecessary! I tried very hard to complete the enchantment and in your words "I tried and that's what matters"." (From "The Hanged Man")

During the game events, Orin stole from Quinn their Ring for awhile. Due to this and not wanting the same done with Astarion, Gale made it so neither could be removed saved for by the other[5]. Every scene of this written sounds a great deal like they're getting engaged, but it's only a heavy allusion, I swear.

With their Rings, they are able to live...realitively normal lives. They travel Faerune, seeing sights together and with their friends that they never could before. They set up a home, though, in Silverymoon for awhile, though often bounce over to Waterdeep and Baldur's Gate for reunions and other meetings. While Astarion begins an apprenticeship and eventually owns his own shop, attached to their home, as a tailor, Quinntav is...a bit all over the place. Their legacy as a hero of Baldur's Gate fortunately doesn't show itself too often beyond the Gate, where people are more likely to put two and two together, and they spend a great deal of their time performing at locations like Solar's Smiling Saytr.

Occasionally they reconvene with the Circus, their woes with the Husbands long since put to bed following the Absolute's destruction while the Circus remained in the City. But more often they spend their days visiting the party: dropping in on Gale[6] in the middle of his classes in Waterdeep, going bar crawling with Karlach whom who has been stated as one of the Military Elite of the Gate, finding themself on misadventures with Wyll in helping better the world, discovering their complicated history with Selune with Shadowheart[7], and reaching out to Lae'zel in the Astral Sea, where she continues her efforts in aiding Orpherus' liberation of their people from the terrible hand of the false-God Vlaakith.

Much time passes. Quinntav, Champion to Raphael, eventually becomes his heir after death, and rules the House of Hope alongside their vampire agent and paramour. But this is after a very, very, long time living a very, very fulfilling life on Toril.

[1] This is a ball park estimate given some legitimacy via "carbon dating" their physiology via the skills of one Lucretious, Ring Master and Necromancer.

[2] A majority of Quinn's evolution with sex and gender identity relates to my own, actually. Though sadly I have never been in a love affair with a Dragonborn and a Human Trapeze Master.

[3] This is a nod to Astarion telling the PC in the game about his meeting with a "sweet boy", whom he spared, and was imprisoned for sparing for a year in starving solitude.

[4] I haven't finished the game yet, but my end goal was to free Orpheus, give Raphael the crown, and frolic away with Astarion to the Underdark to help look after his vampire kin. I'm still unsure if this is all possible in the same run...

[5] Astarion's specifically can only be removed by Quinn so that he 1. cannot remove even if Compelled and 2. outsiders cannot steal it, either.

[6] With Gale they manage to create something known as the Ancunín Blood Diamond, a crystal that dispenses about a quart of blood every other hour. Said blood is a duplication of their own, and this spell was inspired by an item called the Flask of Perpetual Booze. They use the diamond to help aid in feeding the Spawn of the Underdark. Though eventually Gale's Shield is able to be duplicated en masse, and thus so is the Diamond they...eventually see the possible risk of giving people blood from a Spawn of Bhaal. The original diamond is eventually retired, but still used as a symbol in the lore of the Seven Thousand.

[7] Quinn isn't the pious sort, they've done things in Selune's temples that might have earned her ire on occasion. But they still carry a moon and star on their horns, the star in the name of their mother, and the moon for themself, and find some comfort in looking for a connection to their mother through the Lady.

Thank you so much for asking for more! I could go on about Quinn all day (I may have written all of this in one sitting and they're also the reason why I won NaNoWroMo)! I really hope to use them as inspiration for an original story one day, but for now they sit on rotation in my mind ad infantum.

@ididitforthedogs, I'm following your lead! Using this picrew I made a picture of my Tav/Durge, Quinntav Moonwaltz!

It makes them look so ominous, but they're very sweet, I swear!

[theafictionado]

10 Books I Want to Read in 2023

About this time last year I filled out a meme with books I wanted to read in 2022. I can’t find that post, and no one’s tagged me in anything this time around, but I thought it could be fun to post a 2023 update. Feel free to tag me in your own lists!

Sequels: Lost in the Moment and Found (new Wayward Children book! New Wayward Children book!!), A Venom Dark and Sweet (second half of the Book of Tea duology), Heavenly Tyrant (sequel to Iron Widow), Godslayers (sequel to Gearbreakers that I just haven’t gotten around to despite how much I liked the first one. Not to be confused with Godkiller down below. Man, those will look confusing if they end up next to each other in a list…)

Godkiller by Hannah Kaner (coming 2023)

In this world, gods are very real, and our fiery, vengeful heroine makes her living hunting them. She’s all set to take out the God of White Lies when it turns out he’s attached himself to the young daughter of a noble house, who will die if he dies—and vice versa. I don’t know much about this one save for seeing it recommended/highly anticipated by a couple of people I follow. But apparently, its main characters are a traumatised godslaying lady, a former knight who just wants to bake, and a child whose bestie is some sort of trickster god… and that just sounds like a whale of a time even if the setting itself is apparently quite dark.

She is a Haunting by Trang Thanh Tran (coming 2023)

Jade Nguyen goes to stay with her father in Vietnam for the summer and finds herself in a very haunted French colonial manor. I’ve been in the mood for haunted house stories recently (it’s the plot bunnies for a potential new original project, methinks) and this one sounds super interesting for its cultural context and character dynamics.

Bianca Torre is Afraid of Everything by Justine P. Winans (coming 2023)

A teenaged bird nerd accidentally becomes embroiled in a murder mystery while out birdwatching. One for my bibliography of YA with non-binary protagonists, but also just sounds like a fun ride.

Nettleblack by Nat Reeve (already out)

1893: Welsh heiress Henry Nettleblack flees an arranged marriage and disguises herself among a ramshackle group of vigilantes who call themselves the Dallyangle Division. Described as “a neo-Victorian queer farce” and highly recommended by one of my current favourite reviewers. It sounds basically completely different to anything I’ve ever read before and I think will be a light and zany way to expand my literary horizons.

Last Night at the Telegraph Club by Malinda Lo (already out)

A story of young love and queer discovery set in San Francisco Chinatown in the 1950s. I’ve had this for ages but The Stars Have Not Been in Position for me to read it. I’d like to get to it this year!

Plain Bad Heroines by Emily M. Danforth (already out)

At the turn of the 20th century, two secret lovers attending a prestigious all-girls school are tragically and bizarrely killed by a swam of wasps. In the modern day, a film crew descends on the school to make a movie dramatizing the events, and find that the place is haunted (literally?) by more than the girls’ memory. I got this one from a generous friend who was clearing out her shelves and it’s been staring at me from my shelf ever since. PBH is a long-term goal since she’s a thiiiiick book. I’m going to try and dip into it across the year. Or maybe I’ll go feral and get through it in a month! Let’s see.

[mxbutchtwink]

Tell us about your D&D characters!

*kisses you with tongue* thank you for asking!

I have a couple, they are all constantly being developed

Kainan "Varg" Stanko, a half orc (half something else) barbarian who was raised in poverty and by gangs of bandits. He starts adventuring so he can afford to make a better life for himself. He's chaotic neutral, and covered from head to toe in scars- each one with their own story. I've been working on him the longest (8 page backstory blorbo).

Bramble Beetlewing, a fairy cleric who loves to party. He's and extremely feminine guy with bright pink wings and braided hair. A total hippy stoner who just wants to be gay and do arson.

Quin the bigender human paladin (he/she/they) with long as fuck dreads and a heart of gold. Also autism.

Deale, a butch lesbian albino dragon born who uses sie/ser/sern pronouns. Raised as a knight sie was assigned to a beautiful princess who sie fell in love with. After a very tragic event they were separated from each other, and now Deale has dedicated ser life to protecting others. Oh and sie has a prosthetic leg that I can never draw right.

Leandre Celeste, a high elf non-binary gay boy rogue. Cut off from their family's vast fortune, Leandre has to find a way to provide for themself out on the real world. Which is hard because they've never done a hard day's work in their life, so they mostly rely on stealing and swindling from others to get by.

I've also been working on DnD campaigns I want to DM. And I've even started developing my own ttrpgs, a monster of the week esque one and a star trek ish space opera saga, that I've had a lot of fun with! I love creating stories and choose your own adventure type things.